As I read the editor’s letter of Cosmopolitan (November issue) where Farrah Storr said she had previously written an article on her decision not to have children and all the criticism she received, I couldn’t help but think about some of the celebrities *cough cough Jen Aniston* that have been scrutinised for their childless lives. And it baffles me.

Now at 21 years old, more and more people I knew at school are having children, and more and more of these children are now planned. I get to witness their pregnancy progress through photos of growing bumps, ultrasound scans and anything they’ve recently bought for their new addition. And I think good for them. They are clearly so excited about their baby and I’m sure they will make wonderful parents. But that doesn’t mean it is for everyone.

My mum’s best friend does not have children and never felt the maternal yearning my own mum did. She is a brilliant woman, still as caring and kind as any woman who is a mother. Two completely opposite views on children, yet both wonderful people. So why do people make such a big deal about women who say they don’t want children?

There seems to be an assumption that all women do want children and there must be something wrong or cold-hearted about you for not wanting them. It doesn’t make any sense. You can be horrible but as long as you have a child you’re still a good person? I don’t think so. There are plenty of women I know of who have decided to not have children and still live fulfilled and admirable lives.

Luckily I’m at an age where I don’t have to know whether I will have children or not. But I dread to think if I decided not to that people would think less of me. But to me, having children is such a personal decision as they completely change your life. 

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